From the Garden into the Twilight Zone

Sunday, Jan. 31, 2010

On Friday when I made my regular "how are you doing, what train are you taking home?" phone call to Warren he said, are you sitting down?

I said "yes" and he proceeded to tell me that he would no longer have a job at his current firm where he has worked for 6 1/2 years, ever since graduating from Law School. Without explaining details here, the bottom line of the matter is that the firm is taking away the types of cases that are handled by Warren and several other people and giving them to the New York office. So, several people are being let go in a move that isn't personal, but political. It came as a shock because Warren's firm has been extremely stable and has never fired people except for a couple of people who were consistently under-performing, which isn't the case for the group of people being let go this round.

I have to admit, it did hurt to hear that news and I did cry pretty hard after we got off the phone. That afternoon a million things went through my head. Some of them included, I'm having a baby in two months, how will this work out with health insurance etc? Will this end up meaning a move or staying here? How long can we make it financially without a job?

We talked to Rebecca about what was going on. She was very rational about it and asked a lot of good questions. I'm grateful that she isn't worried right now.

We spent the evening watching funny TV shows which was a really good way to escape reality for a few hours.

Yesterday we got to work networking and contacting our friends. It has been very touching to hear people's responses and the information they come up for us. I have felt peaceful. In fact, we are actually excited. We feel like this could mean something better for us. We have talked about a job switch for years, but things never worked out. Now that it is forced upon us we are going to be looking with real intent for a better situation for Warren and our family.

It has been an interesting week. The lesson in Sunday School today was about Adam and Eve and the Fall from the Garden of Eden. In preparation for today's lesson Warren and I had been discussing the Fall all week long. After the news of the job loss we felt like we were going through our own little "being kicked out of the garden." It had been a place we felt secure, but in order to progress we needed to be kicked out of the garden and experience something new.

It has felt a little surreal. Most of the time my brain is fine and says, things will work out just fine. Every so often the little nagging voices want to say: some people are out of work for months, even a year or more, how would you cope with that? In some strange way however, I'm grateful for the opportunity to empathize with so many many people who have experienced job loss. It is such a common theme. It makes you grateful for your blessings. It is also interesting how in one swoop you think about all the things you can do without for awhile.

Thank you, dear friends, from the emotional support you have already given us. I think that is part of the reason I feel so at peace. I know I'm not alone.